Hello,

I'm just back in Montana after spending a week on the Central California coast at a Nonviolent Communication retreat. (NVC) I've recently started delving more deeply into NVC as it is closely aligned with a lot of work I already do, especially around assessing feelings and needs and being aware what we're feeling and validating ourselves.

Here's what the main NVC website says as a brief intro:

Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is sometimes referred to as compassionate communication. Its purpose is to strengthen our ability to inspire compassion from others and to respond compassionately to others and to ourselves. NVC guides us to reframe how we express ourselves and hear others by focusing our consciousness on what we are observing, feeling, needing, and requesting.

We are trained to make careful observations free of evaluation, and to specify behaviors and conditions that are affecting us. We learn to hear our own deeper needs and those of others, and to identify and clearly articulate what we are wanting in a given moment. When we focus on clarifying what is being observed, felt, and needed, rather than on diagnosing and judging, we discover the depth of our own compassion. Through its emphasis on deep listening—to ourselves as well as others—NVC fosters respect, attentiveness and empathy, and engenders a mutual desire to give from the heart. The form is simple, yet powerfully transformative.

While it is taught through the use of a concrete model, and is referred to as “a process of communication” or a “language of compassion,” Nonviolent Communication is more than a process or a language. As our cultural conditioning often leads our attention in directions unlikely to get us what we want, NVC serves as an ongoing reminder to focus our attention on places that have the potential to yield what we are seeking—a flow between ourselves and others based on a mutual giving from the heart.

You can read more about NVC on the Center for Nonviolent Communication [1] website.

Also, read my personal notes on NVC [1] from this retreat.

I look forward to the opportunity to offer some education in this NVC process in conjunction with other workshops in Montana.

- Patrick